To my beautiful wife

You are the one who I cherish and you are my world. I know I tell you everyday that you are beautiful and I love you heaps, but I wanted to write this down so that you would have this to remember if you are ever down and I am away.

Andy Griggs song "She thinks she needs me" cannot put it better in the chorus "She don’t know how much I need her,  She don’t know I’d fall apart, Without her kiss, without her touch, Without her faithful, loving arms,
She don’t know that it’s all about her, She don’t know I can’t live without her, She’s my world, she’s my everything, And she thinks she needs me."

Never forget that I love you and you are my one and only.

Feel Good

What makes you feel good? A hug, a chat with a friend, outing with some friends, playing sports, exercising or even pets are just a few things that can make you feel good. Is it wrong to enjoy what makes you feel good? No, well if it isn't illegal drugs, gambling (in the case of obsessive gambling) or anything harmful. A lot of us can only maybe enjoy something once a week or something a long those lines. But we should never give up on these things as they can help in more ways than you think. For example, if a person is depressed, doing something that makes them feel happy, even for a minute, can speed up the recovery time. Because without doing something that we like regularly, we tend to forget how good it makes us feel which can then make us feel down. It doesn't have to be something that costs you money. A chat with a friend, a nice walk in the park or even watching your favourite TV show or movie.

Another way that can make us feel good is talking to others about our problems. Getting them off our chest cannot only make you feel good but can lighten the load from stress & other problems. A friend, family members or even a professional can be great. Finding someone that makes you feel safe and secure can help. Writing a blog is a great way to get things off your chest. Who knows, you could even make a friend or two.

I am the first to admit that sometimes you may get down or stressed. But even remembering these good times can take the edge off your problem. 

Take The Opportunity

Always take the opportunity. Because one day you won't be able to.

Everyday you spend time with the one you love, it can make you feel warm and loved. A hug can take away the pain from an illness or mend a broken heart. That feeling you get may only last for a minute but that minute is worth more than all the gold in the world. When you hear their voice it can brighten up a dark room. But when was the last time you said thank you or I love you? Many people have lost a loved one or someone close to them. I would guarantee that most of them wish they could have told the one they lost that they love them or that they appreciate everything that they did for them. That feeling can haunt you for a long time. Always take the opportunity to thank the one you love, a best friend or even a person that you feel comfortable with. I lost my father recently to cancer. I was lucky to be there for his death and for me to tell him that I loved him before he took his last breath. For months later I felt that I was not a good son to him and that I never told him that I appreciated everything he did for me. But my wife always reminded me that the time I spent with him and everything I have done, he was proud of me and that the life I have made for myself was all my father wanted me to have, he had brought me up the right way. Is that enough? There isn't a day that goes by that I wish I told him that I was proud of being his son.

There might be a parent or sibling that you don't speak to anymore, I know I have. You might be thinking "what do you do then, the last time you have spoken to them you had a argument"? I know I have tried to patch things up, but they won't speak to me. So I sent them a email, telling them how I felt and that I still loved them. But still nothing. I know in my heart that I have done everything that could have been done. In this situation you need to make peace in your heart. This is not going to stop that feeling of regret, but it will make the healing of getting over the loss some what easier.

If you have lost someone, remember the good times together, the moments that made you laugh and the times that they made you feel loved, safe and warm. Talk to others about them. Remembering these good times, will not take the pain away completely, but it can surely make the load lighter.  

So I write this blog not to make you depressed or sad, but to remind you to take the opportunity to say "I love you" to the person you love or to your family members. Because one day it will be too late.

Fear

(Note: I am not a doctor or health professional. I am just a person who suffers from different fears)

Fear! It can make you face a challenge and beat it. But it is the other fear, the fear that stops you from doing something that I am talking about. Is there any different between the two, sometimes. But I want to focus on the fear/phobia that stops you. I have a major fear of Vomiting. It is called "Emetophobia". You may think why would someone fear that? Or it must be very rare. Well it is quite common. Like many phobias, some people do not like to tell you that they are afraid of something. Because of this fear, I have stopped eating twice for a couple weeks at a time. I believed that if I ate then I was going to be sick, which I never have. There were times that I never left the house or when I have felt funny in the stomach I would have a panic attack. I have fear of heights, spiders etc. but nothing like Emetophobia. Is there a cure for this fear. Well they say there is and it is costly. You might be thinking the best way to over come it is to just vomit or make your self sick and then you will find that it isn't that bad. Well that may work some people, but for me and most sufferers, that will make things worse. For example, a person who has fear of spiders can attend workshops that they slowly introduce you to spiders. Over the time you will become more comfortable with spiders. (I am not saying that a fear of spiders is not bad or that the workshops help everyone, I am just making an example) But doing that for Emetophobia can actually bring damage to yourself by forcing yourself to vomit.

So I am guessing a few people in the world will say what was I thinking when I typed this on my blog? Well I am hoping that it can become more known to the world and help people to understand it and as well to help people who suffer from it not to be afraid to suffer and to realise that you are not alone.

I still suffer quite badly from it. I don't know how to get over it either but I can surely tell you how I cope with it. When I start to become anxious about feeling sick, my beautiful wife reassures me that it is only a feeling and that I am not going to be sick. This reassureance is helping, but psychologists will say that I will have to start reassuring myself and not relying on my wife. One thing I would like to stress to everyone even if you don't suffer Emetophobia, NEVER STOP EATING!!! I have damamged my body so much that now I suffer from reflux which I have to use high dosages of medication and I suffer from irritable bowel sydrome. My immune system is shot which I am more susceptable to flu's and bugs. I cannot stress this point enough!

Fears/Phobias can change your life. Never let a fear to over come you. Seek help and support straight away if it starts to interfear with your life. I will stress that I am not saying that if you have a fear you are going to become sick, just keep an eye on it. Professional help can help you. Some medications can help some phobias effects. So can support from family, friends or support groups.

I hope that you have found my blog interesting and I hope that you will read my blogs in the future. Please let me know what your thoughts are.