19 November, 2009

Feeling Alone

Have you ever felt alone? A lot of us have. But for some it affects them quite often. The phobia is called "Monophobia". I have suffered with this phobia on and off for a few years. It not only affects the person who is suffering from it, but it can affect the partner or relatives of that person. Let me explain. The feeling of being alone is an awful feeling. Just imagine getting that feeling out of the blue. You could be sitting in the middle of a shopping centre and all of a sudden this awful feeling takes over. You may be wondering how it affects the person who is with you? It affects them because here you are with them keeping them company and they get this alone feeling. It can make you feel not wanted or that your company is not good enough. But that is further from the truth. I know it makes my wife feel that she's not wanted when I get these feelings. It is only now that she does not take offence to it. According to research, Monophobia can go hand in hand with Agoraphobia. This can cause some discomfort as some may need to be around a lot of people to combat that feeling of loneliness. One way to combat this dilemma, is to build up some confidence with dealing with crowds is to find maybe a park where there is some people around. This will allow the person to interact with people, but with the comfort of a open space. Evidence seems to suggest that the Monophobic suffers have feelings of being unsafe and can be the main focus for them.

One way to reduce this feeling of loneliness is to try to distract yourself. Preferably with something that you find enjoyment, for example a hobby or a walk in the park. Having a few distraction options available to you when you notice the feeling coming on, can sometimes lesson the effects of it. Monophobia like many phobias, cannot be talked or bullied out of someone. Seeing a trained professional can help ease the effects over time.

I hope this has given you a bit of an insight into this phobia and how it has made me feel. Some may find that this phobia affects them in different ways. If you suffer from Monophobic, you are not alone.


Beautiful Dreamer said...

Fantastic post!

Beautiful Dreamer

Better Man said...

Thanks for the comment Beautiful Dreamer.

Michael said...


My name is Michael, and I'm a student from Hong Kong. I wandered over here from the Coffee Shop.

I used to always feel lonely, but I guess, for me, it was having low self-esteem, like I'm not good enough for the people around me. Learning to value my own worth was the only way I could confront this problem.

Interesting post. You might like my personal blog, "If you're going through Hell, keep going." I tend to write about my feelings and stuff in there.

Do you hate it too?
"If you're going through Hell, keep going."
Holy Holism!

Better Man said...

Thanks for the comment Michael. I will defiantly check out your blog.

Fighting For me said...

Hey there better man. I can feel your pain and joy. I am also having some issues of mine and you say the things I feel. I also started a blog please visit if you can.

Thanks 4me

Anonymous said...

i feel dat feeling too, right at ds very moment of time......
and its killing me gently dat all i wanna do is cry until ders no more tears to cry on......
not to breath coz i choose to......
feeling dat dat loneliness and aloneness im feeling will drag me in my own damn grave......;'X...
(i want to be numb w/ everything so i will not feel anything......anymore!)